Tuesday, June 25, 2013

The Gift of Quality Time

In his book The Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman reveals how different people express love in different ways. There are five specific languages of love, they are:
  • Quality Time
  • Words of Affirmation
  • Gifts
  • Acts of Service
  • Physical Touch
Now granted Dr. Chapman has written this book about languages of Love between spouses or significant others, but these love languages can be applied to any relationship.

I have known for quite some time that my language for feeling loved is Quality Time. Dr. Chapman describes Quality Time as giving someone your UNDIVIDED attention. "A central aspect of Quality Time is Togetherness". Togetherness can mean doing an activity together were we are giving the other person our full attention. For me that can mean going wine tasting with my husband or being out on the golf course together (I don't golf, I just drive the cart, so no frustrations on my part). My Quality Time with Mallory can be a day of shopping, sitting at the beach, or just talking about life long after our lunch is finished.

Last week, Mallory gave me the best gift of Quality Time. A day spent together, a day we call "One More Thing" day. It got that name because that was the title of a note she gave me about "one more thing" added to my Mother's Day gifts a few years ago. It is a day she plans, pays for, and surprises me with each year.

Our day began with five numbered envelopes...

Envelope #1 revealed...

A walk along Lake Michigan. We probably walked for 45 minutes, spending time together, talking and stopping to take pictures now and then.

Envelope #2 revealed...

We didn't do this right a way. We saved it for the following night.

Envelope #3 revealed...

Lunch out. The first place I chose didn't work out since their kitchen was closed for remodeling :(
Although we found a better option in the end. We went to a restaurant called City Vu, which is exactly how it sounds. It is on the top floor of a downtown hotel, lovely views of the city and we were able to sit outside on the patio, perfect temperatures.

Envelope #4 revealed...

Something we have talked about doing for the last three years, an inside tour of the Felt Mansion. If you have followed my blog for a while you will know that I went to the Felt Mansion this Spring for a photo walk of the outside of the estate. Now I finally got to tour the inside, and yes there are pictures. I am saving those for a separate post.

#5 The final envelope...

The perfect way to end the day...

This has been my favorite "One More Thing" day yet. Since Mallory had a job this summer she had a little more cash to plan something a little more elaborate than in past years, but ultimately it isn't about the money spent it is the Quality Time spent together that makes this the best gift.

What do you think your language of Love is?

This was a BIG Photo Heart Connection for me this month. Joining Kat Sloma for June's Photo-Heart Connection link up.


  1. Fantastic! Love, love, love the idea. I may 'borrow' it.

  2. My language of love is definitely quality time - I didn't even have to think about it. I love nothing more than spending some time with the ones I love. Mallory planned a wonderful day for you - you'll enjoy these memories for a long time!

  3. I'm in for all 5 of the "languages" -- and that "one more thing" day is a treasure that the two of you will always share and create wonderful memories with!

  4. Love this idea, looks like you had an amazing day. I looked at the 5 languages for a course I was doing - and came up as quality time too. Love how Mallory has planned this all out so beautifully and love the images you have to remember your day.

  5. Great idea time is far more important...

  6. Great post. I really like what you are doing lately. Did that class inspire you? For me time, words and touch.

  7. What a treasure indeed is this kind of love!


  8. I can't tell you how much I enjoyed reading this post....Dr. Chapman has been one of the pastors at my church for the last 42 years. He just finished serving as interim pastor. I have to tell you I am going to miss all of his wonderful sermons.....

    And of course being very familiar with his book "The Five Love Languages" it was fun to know we both have the same love language...quality time.....Your daughter's idea for Mother's Day was wonderful and I could tell from reading between the lines that you really enjoyed your time with her......

  9. A most awesome day! I often wish I had a sister or daughter or Mother around to do thing like that. My LL is words and gifts.

  10. This tradition is just so sweet it makes me teary! Your daughter created such a special day for both of you! I think I fit best in the first category. I love to spend time with those I hold dear! But, I sure love the hugs, the kisses, the squeezes, and the hand holding with my grandsons!

  11. What a sweet gift! The relationship you share with Mallory is so special! Looking forward to seeing the pictures from the inside of your tour!

  12. What an awesome gift this was!! Very special!

  13. Sounds like the best day ever! Quality time is my way of feeling loved. I'm glad you got to spend such a special day with your loved one.

  14. I loved your post, photos, writing, ideas, all of it. I'm going to read it again...

  15. I'm not surprised your affection is shown in attention to another. When I read that, I thought about the comments you leave on my blog-with attention to me and it's obvious with sincerity. My brother used to give this type of gift to my father each year-snowshowing, hiking, fishing-stuff like that. It sounds like Mallory gave a lot of thought to what would be a special day with you...and one that was a day, not just a couple hours.
    I look forward to seeing the pics from the mansion. I love that little path on the left of the exterior.
    Happy day my friend.

  16. Oh... this is a wonderful post, I have enjoyed the reading and the photos very much. Such a fabulous idea! Lucky you!. Sweet photo-heart connection.

    Gifts and Acts of Service are my natural -so to say- language of love. I have discovered the great importance of quality time in particular since my mother is ageing, but sometimes it´s a great challenge because I am prone to take on many tasks. I am learning "words of affirmation" and dealing with "physical touch" because I am introvert... but I am getting better.

  17. What joy! The best gift of all is quality time! You are fortunate to have such a thoughtful daughter. The book sounds intriguing -- I'll have to add it to my list. Thank you.

  18. What a WONDERFUL Tradition! I think Quality Time is my language of Love, too. I would love to start a tradition like this with my mom. Thank you for the idea!
    --Michele at Sweet Leaf, visiting from PHC

  19. love to read about your day and see the pictures, such a lovely way to spend quality time together....wow!

  20. Wow your wonderful "One more thing" day was matched only by your beautiful images. Nicely done!

  21. What a fabulous day! I've read the book and I can't quite remember but I think my love language was Acts of Service. The most important thing to me is people doing what they say they are going to do. Thanks for sharing in the Photo-Heart Connection, and sorry for my delay in coming by. I'm catching up on June along with July!


Thank you so much for visiting today and taking the time to read my thoughts on life. :)